I count down sometimes in days and months. And on these days, it is with mixed feelings. I have no doubt that you would be amazing because I talk to God about you a lot. This makes me happy because I know that my name would go down in history as a legend-the woman who birthed and grew another legend.
And just as I am happy, I get scared too. See, I am not so good with this emotional thing and so you just might find out that I cry too much. So I might cry when you smile at me or crawl towards me in excitement or when you call me ‘Momma!’… I am scared that I would be too protective of you. Scared to let you out of my wings, scared to let you fall and stand on your own. I know your dad would help me with that but nonetheless, I get scared
But let us not dwell too much on my fears…lol, I am not a psycho, don’t worry. I look forward to days when I would sneak into your room to cover you up with your duvet. To days when I go to your games and scream myself hoarse when you score.
I know we might fight too but we would get past that…lol.
I would try to be as open as I can to you. I would prayerfully guide you through life while giving you your privacy.
I hope you aren’t as argumentative as I am. That I am sure of. I would teach you how to dance…if I am allowed so we can win gifts in competitions and hopefully ‘blow’…But asides the fun things I might have planned out in my head, one thing I must help you with is your spiritual life. Not only would I be a spiritual covering, I would also make sure you grow in God. I know you would love God anyways.
Just like me, you would discover that He truly is everything. I hope you find that at a very early stage.
I would also teach you to be a gentleman. Treating a woman (and people generally) right (those kinda stuff). So on your prom date, girls would going to be all over you asking you out.. Scratch that! No prom for you…loool.
But one thing you would never have to doubt is my love for you. For it would be reflected in my words and actions. I won’t leave you with one void of the other. And when I spank you too, or discipline you, it would be laced with plenty love. Like I said, I would be open to you. So you just would understand these things. I would see the good in you and nurture it as God helps me. I would not just be your ‘MO-the one who always screams and never understands-THER’ but would be a friend too… I love you already. Just writing this makes me swoon in joy so deep I cannot explain. And I would accept who God has made you to be. It may not be what I myself would have loved you to be but I would accept it that way. And by made you to be, I mean your career goals and future path.
I would also be a good mother in love…I would try not to find out reasons why wifey may not be right for you. Because I know you would pick good. You would be a good man who makes right decisions. And this because you would always walk in the spirit.
Oh…and yeah, I am going to teach you how to sing. You thought you were gonna escape that? Loool…No way. You would be my first backup singer as I have a feeling your Dad might not have my strength or time (lool..I would have made him ‘tired of me’ before your arrival). I would also teach you how to bake cake. Because well, once you can bake cake, you have truly truly won my heart.
I love you ‘Y’…Now and Always…
Written by Ayobami Ajayi : A prospective mum!